“High-functioning” is not reassuring me; it is reassuring you

pleasedontcallmenormal:

I heard the word “high-functioning” six times when I got the results of my Autism assessment. I hear it again every time my parents tell someone I am Autistic. The sentiment is there every time someone tries to tell me me I really have Asperger’s and not Autism. 

They think they are complimenting me. That they are reassuring me that I am still somewhat human- somewhat worthy of respect. They don’t understand that every time they use this word to describe me, my anxiety only increases.

The thing about “high-functioning” is it becomes an expectation. More than an expectation: a requirement.

When you’re respected for being  considered high-functioning, it implies the “low-functioning” people don’t deserve the same respect. 

And you’re left knowing that people don’t truly respect you- but the image you put on to survive. And you know that if you let yourself slip in their eyes into the “low-functioning” category, the respect they have for you slips away too.

Will you still be respected if you have meltdown or go non-verbal in public?

Will you keep your friends if you flap or rock around them?

 Will the world still respect you when you’re no longer just a shy,slightly awkward, quirky “high-functioning” aspie?

Will the world still accept you when you are no longer their Sheldon Cooper?

And if not, then what?