Raise ur hand if u ever feel like your trauma wasn’t “serious” enough to justify your reaction to it and u feel like a fake victim every day of your life!!!!!
Tag: abuse
People with good parents get so offended when abused children speak negatively of their parents. Like…REALLY offended lol.
They say things like “Your mom would do anything for you” and “Your parents sacrificed a lot for you!” and “I don’t respect anyone who talks down on their parents.”
But just because YOUR parents would do anything for you and sacrificed a lot for you doesn’t mean it applies to all parents. We don’t have the same experience boo. You can’t tell me shit about what my mama would do for me. All moms and dads are not created equal.
I sometimes feel like my abuse isn’t Official Real Abuse
everyone else’s abuse is Real Abuse, but mine isn’t
and calling it “abuse” is unfair to people who have been through Real Abuse
so if you sometimes feel that way too
here I am, a person with Real Abuse
saying your abuse is Official Real Abuse
and you are allowed to call it “abuse”
because it is
you are very brave
just because a ship is fictional doesnt mean it cant hurt people
when abuse survivors such as myself are exposed to untagged abusive or toxic ships clogging a main tag it can upset or trigger them
our feelings and experiences are valid and just because the thing upsetting us is “fictional” it does not make our feelings any less real
please respect abuse survivors
hey this is just a request but if you feel safe to reblog this could you maybe consider doing so? i think this is kind of important and so many times people speak over abuse survivors on these issues and say that our feelings dont matter. i think it might be good for this to be spread around a little
Resources for Safety Planning and Escaping Abuse
in lieu of writing a comprehensive post about this myself which will hopefully have general information as well as situation-specific information, here’s some external links that may help
These links are specifically for women in situations of spousal abuse but much of this advice is applicable to other situations
another resource for safety planning (similar to above)
Safety planning theory (primarily an academic resource)
apparently this needs to be said but uh abusive behavior is not excusable, even if its caused by mental illness, like
i get that it can make you manipulative or want to lash out. i really do. but you need to apologize when you are called out for it, you cant excuse it by saying youre mentally ill, you cant accuse people of ableism when theyre really just saying “hey this isnt cool you should apologize for this”
there are ableist people who assume that mentally ill people are inherently abusive. but being expected to own up to your abusive actions is not ableist. being held responsible is not ableist. you are not completely free of any and all criticism
guess what?
- you’re not obligated to forgive your abuser/s
- if it’s been two weeks, a month, a year, or even a decade since your abuse happened, you still have a right to be angry about what happened
- you don’t have to “get over it”
- you don’t have to forgive your abuser/s and you DEFINITELY don’t have to trust them
- it’s okay to hurt
and it’s ok to be mad
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