I was re-watching Teen Titans and I thought of this. I like thinking about crossovers that can never ever happen.
This is my first time drawing Beast Boy, by the way.
hold on, back that truck the FUCK up, beast boy’s name is Garfield??? like- you realize- he’s like, he can turn into animals, that includes cats, he could turn into Garfield and his name would be Garfield and then Jim Davis Would Have To Sue DC Comics.
Look, if it’s a real ghost, the busters get custody. If it’s just a real estate developer in a costume it’s out of their jurisdiction so we gotta hand things off to these meddling kids and their dog.
The Addams Family Adopt the Baudelaires – Headcanons
trust’s note: i saw a post where someone recommended an au where the baudelaires get adopted by the addams family, sooooo
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-when count olaf first hears about it, he laughs
-because he’d already killed so many people before and taken them down. what was another four?
-but then him and his associates arrive at the house and everyone else is just,,, gone
-like “we’ll meet you at the next guardian’s house”
-because they’re not trying to die
-and when the baudelaires first arrive, klaus is like “nope”
-because the house is already really intimidating and the last time they saw a house as bad as this, it was count olaf’s
-and violet is still really scared but she’s convinced herself that it was going to be fine and that they really had no other choice, because some protection from count olaf was better than none
-scared sh*tless when they actually meet gomez and morticia because holy crap they’re tall and actually really pale and they’re wearing all black are they vampires violet i think they’re vampires vIOLET
-start calming down when they see wednesday and pugsley, because that probably means that they’re actually good with kids and they’re not just after their fortune
-sunny says soemthing about how creepy they all are and morticia immediately understands her
-“sodneosnosjf” “that’s particularly rude”
-the banker thinks they’re a bad excuse for a guardian but the baudelaires drown it out because what does he know?
-the addams family is actually really nice to them and wednesday, sunny and violet bond over shared interest of inventions (except wednesday’s ideas are hella dark, of course)
-gomez brings klaus to their library and oh my god this boy is aMAZED
-“a library is like an island in a vast sea of ignorance” “you want to go to an island??? im afraid we cant do that. wednesday can’t swim.” “wait no–”
-count olaf first tries to get into their house by disguising himself as a plumber
-wednesday opens the door looking hella bored as she listens to him try to explain himself
-slams the door in his face mid-sentence
-his next effort is to try and chase after pugsley on his way to school.
-he poisons one of his sandwiches when he leaves it unattended, and hides behind a bush when he comes back
-when pugsley doesnt die and just keeps eating the sandwich hes like ?????????
-did i grab the wrong sandwich?????? is he eating the wrong sandwich?????
-yeah no it’s the right sandwich
-he straight up cLIMBS ONTO THE BALCONY AT ONE POINT AND BREAKS INTO MORTICIA AND GOMEZ’S BEDROOM AND STABS GOMEZ IN THE STOMACH AND HE??? DOESN’T EVEN FLINCH??????
-yeah hes thrown off the balcony and ends up breaking his arm after that
-this boy comes back a fOURTH. TIME.
-this time the addams actually invite him in for dinner
-and the baudelaires are like wHAT ARE YOU DOING WHAT NO STOP THAT
-they don’t stop that
-the addams are making casual conversation and wednesday eventually gets bored and pours poison into his drink
-“violet, sunny, klaus, please go to your rooms. we have some business to take care of”
-liTERALLY WHILE HE WAS DYING
-they cry when the addams finally finish out the paperwork
-“violet, klaus, and sunny addams”
-the baudelaires live a happy and pleasant life with the addams family because that’s what they deserved from the beginning and you can’t convince me otherwise bye
concept: willy wonka and harry potter take place in the same universe the ministry of magic haaaates Willy Wonka
“Mr. Wonka,” Dumbledore smiled warmly, looking down into the Pit from his podium. The members of the Wizengamot muttered disapprovingly, shifting in their seats. Willy Wonka, clad today in a bright magenta suit and tophat, beamed cheekily up at them from his chair, his silver-gloved hands cradling his chin.
“Mr. Dumbledore,” He replied brightly, with the barest hint of a lisp.
“I trust you know why you are here?” Dumbledores question was crisp and businesslike, but the twinkle in his eye gave away his amusement at the situation.
“Not at all! I’ve nary a clue,” Wonka wiggled his eyebrows. Dumbledore audibly stifled a laugh.
“You are accused of improper use of magic, improper use of muggle artifacts, and several counts of using magic in front of a muggle,” Dumbledore reminded him. He conjured a projection with his wand. Displayed in grainy sepia was Willy Wonka, arm around a boy of around 10. Behind his back, he twitched an ash wand, and machines in the background around them whirred to life, producing all manner of sweets.
The projection ran its course and collapsed, and Dumbledore stowed his wand back inside his robes.
Wonka smiled and fiddled with his hat.
“How do you plead?” Dumbledore asked, leaning forward eagerly for what would surely be an amusing trial.
“Not guilty on all counts,” Wonka said, perhaps a tad smugly.
The members of the Wizengamot muttered amongst themselves. Not Guilty? Impossible!
Dumbledore hushed them quickly. “Explain, if you would. We have, after all, quite a mountain of evidence.”
Wonka stood and brushed a bit of dust off his suit. He tipped his hat mischievously. “Of course,” he grinned.
“Firstly, use of magic shall only be considered improper whereby it is applied to cause harm or applied recklessly. All magic used in my sweets is rigorously tested for both safety and taste. It is not used to cause harm, but to bring joy.” Wonka paused to adjust his jacket.
“But surely,” Dumbledore said, leafing through his notes, “you cannot deny that you illegally charmed several thousand muggle artifacts?”
“Ah, but I can,” Wonka said, now twirling his cap in his hands. “Muggle artifact refers, of course, to any muggle made object. But, you see, I built those machines, each and every one. They are not muggle machines at all, but wizarding machines, built by a wizard. The factory itself, as well. You could argue that, as machines are a muggle invention, I still broke the rules, but then I could argue that every wizard dwelling with any charms applied to its walls is in violation of the law, as muggles were the first to make bricks.”
The Wizengamot glared silently. He was right, of course. Violating the spirit of the law was not illegal if one followed the letter.
“And the last charge? These are definitely Muggle children, are they not? No magical talent, raised in muggle society?” Dumbledore straightened his glasses and peered down at Wonka, his eyes still bright with intrigue.
“Not at all,” Wonka grinned, placing his hat back on his head. “You see, the ticket system was not nearly so random as I pretended. The tickets were charmed, they would only becomes visible to children with magical heritage. All the children chosen were second generation Squibs.” Wonka bowed low, as if he were finishing a particularly well executed play.
“Well, ladies and gentlemen, it seems no laws were violated after all.” Dumbledore stifled a grin at the groans of angry disapproval from the Wizengamot.
“But he very clearly violated the intent of the rules!” Spluttered a large, rather red faced wizard in the second row. “He’s just…cheating! He’s cheating!”
“Ah, this is true, but he did not, technically speaking, break any of the rules. He did not expose muggles to magic, nor enchant muggle made objects, nor improperly apply magic anymore so than any magical confectioner. I’m afraid we have to let him go.” Dumbledore smiled gently and put away the rather thick file with Wonka’s name embossed on the cover. For the brief second it was open, a list of hundreds of charges with “Not Guilty” inked beside them was visible. It was carried off by a house elf, and the Wizengamot began to file out until only Dumbledore was left.
“You’re a very clever man,” He called down to Wonka. “We could use you at Hogwarts, you know.”
“No thank you,” Wonka called back, grinning. “Skirting the law is far more fun!”
question: do you think thomas and martha wayne ever offered to make a huge donation to pbs or the children’s television workshop in exchange for bruce being able to meet some muppets. has bruce wayne been to sesame street. somewhere in wayne manor are there pictures of bruce wayne hugging big bird and snuffie. does bruce wayne still secretly consider kermit a close personal friend.
what if that christmas bruce insists on including kermit on the christmas card list. he is six and his parents humor him and let him write a personal note to kermit. a sesame street writer is tasked with writing the return christmas card. they do it the next year and the next and one year kermit writes bruce a very heartfelt letter about how much he misses jim henson, about love and grief and remembering the good times. you would think this tradition would stop when bruce was a teen but it did not. he could never bring himself to stop. bruce wayne, grown-ass batman, still sending christmas cards to sesame street.
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