Professor: I’ll add three points to your final grade if you-
Me: I’ll do it. I don’t care. Are the next words out of your mouth going to be “kill a man”? ‘Cause I’ll do it. I don’t care. Give me those fucking points so I get a decent grade and feel fucking validated. I hate myself.

im-significant:

songofsunset:

Forgetting to change your keyboard language like

ALL THE FUCKING TIME

*someone reblogs one of my posts*
*immediately checks to see if they said something in the tags*

speed-dealer-sheogorath:

tfw u close all the tabs w/ academic articles ur referencing after finishing ur assignment. relief. i am safe from academia once more

me coming back from anywhere: straight to my room and on the computer

timecurry:

hellohelbig:

justindonuts:

lets-get-krunk:

“I really don’t want to shower but I want to be clean” an autobiography

“Now that I’m in the shower I really dont wanna get out” a sequel

“Now that I’m out, I don’t want to put on clothes” the spin-off

“I’m sitting here in my towel and I must have showered 2 hours ago” the self help booklet